Jay's Jottings

Adventures abroad – Ludinghausen 2009

As adventure abroad go, this was a very tame one.

We didn’t get lost. We didn’t hit anything in the hired car – (Including the kerb – a first!) and we didn’t have any “discussions“ with the locals!

Bert gave this one a miss, he was counting his money – he started on 1st January and expects to finish the job by the end of May (2010!)

So it was a small party of just myself, Steve Brace and Les Rumsey. Les arranged all the car hire (I think there are only two companies that will let him hire their cars now!) and I booked up the Ryanair flight with an Electron card to save booking fees.

With a 7.25 am flight from Stansted on the day of the meeting we arranged to meet at the airport at 5.45 am. 

Les Rumsey had to travel from Kent and arranged to leave his car at Berts (Just goes to show that those who say Bert has no use whatsoever are wrong!) to avoid the airport car park charges.

I was to meet Les at Berts at 05.10am but at 4.40am my home phone rang – I was dead to the world and guessed it was my alarm clock radio, so switched that OFF, and when the phone kept ringing I picked it up and put it down again to stop it ringing!!!

I then realised what I had done and spoke to Les, the AA route had said 1 hour 40 mins to get to Berts and he had done it in an hour (No surprises there then))

We travelled by local bus to the airport – it went all round the housing estates including those that weren’t built yet – it reminded me why I always travel by car !

On arrival at the airport we met Steve Brace and went through security without incident (another first!)

Les wandered off to buy some aftershave, we had plenty of time before needing to get to the gate. 

Well, we managed to lose Les in the aftershave shop, how can you lose a bloke as ugley as Les, wearing a cowboy hat, in a women’s shop?

We eventually found him – he had walked out of another entrance, so off to the bar and the breakfast I was looking forward to.  Les decided there wasn’t time for breakfast, our gate was next up on the departure board but not yet allocated, Steve Brace reluctantly agreed with him and they had a coffee each.  “Well F you’s two, I am having a full English breakfast and a pint, I will see you at the gate if I haven’t finished before the gate is called” I said.

The breakfast came quickly and the pair of them watched me shovel it in mouthful by mouthful. Green? You bet they were!  I finished my breakfast and my pint just as the gate was called, “You two could have both had a breakfast too then” I gleefully
stated! 

So off to the gate.

When we arrived at the gate something was wrong…………….. no damm plane  - it wasn’t there!!!

We then heard it was delayed for 45 mins and hadn’t even landed yet! (I suspected that it may not have even took off from wherever it was coming from and they were going to cancel the flight cos it was due to be only half full!)

We waited at the gate and watched the Ryanair factory at work (They are the only airline that fly from those particular gates) anyone walking past with more than one item of hand baggage or an oversize bag was “pulled” and given the opportunity to “sort it out` or pay an extra £30.00. How some people thought they were going to get away with it was amazing to watch. Best of all was one girl with loads of bags, she cleverly got it all in one big bag with the help of her mates who sat on it whilst she zipped it up. But it was to no avail, when she got it all into one bag the Ryanair staff said  “now see if that bag will go in the size measuring cage” no chance!

Eventually the plane arrived and we all got on – it was only half full, we dived for the over wing exit seats, the air hostess started to tell us how to open the doors in emergency, but was horrified when we said we will do it now and throw the door onto the wing like the instructions said  - just for a practice!

It was a short flight to Düsseldorf Weeze airport, which looked like a World War 2 / Cold War type of airport, nucleur plane shelters everywhere, and it had FIVE control towers for good measure.

We hired the car ok, and they gave Les instructions for bringing the car back and parking it – Les quipped “what makes you think we are bringing it back “ the desk clerk smiled -  who says the Germans have no sense of humour!

We decided to take the A road route rather than the motorway as it looked a lot less distance that way – which was a big mistake because the whole country  was on a days holiday as it was fathers day (Why do us Brits have Fathers day on a Sunday  and not get a day off ?)

It was a slow journey to the track, Les annoyed a biker at one point by trying to rub our car number plate on the back wheel of his bike, he kept waving Les away, yeh right, some hope – it made Les drive even closer!!!

When we got onto a bit of open road Les put his foot down and fortunately eagle eyed Steve Brace spotted a speed camera before we got to it, it involved an emergency manoeuvre to drop from 140 kmh to 50 kmh in 0.5 seconds and it tested my seat belt restraint severely!

Whilst we were doing 140kmh Les commented on the engine revving a bit – not surprising really – we only hired the cheapest car available. Les is good at multi tasking at that speed, he can read a map and smoke at the same time, but needs assistance when the car in front slows – “BRAKE”!!!

We parked close to the track and made it in time for the presentations, we watched from the far bend/finish straight, the speed up the straight is unbelievable. Nick Radley said he had never been so fast in his life and it was scary!

We met Gerd Hubrich during the meeting and it was good to have a short chat with him, Gerd was really helpful to us Brits following Duncans accident at the track – how is Duncan these days – can anyone give us an update?

During the interval – Les played with some German children who thought he had entered the scarecrow competition because he was wearing a funny hat!

The meeting ended and we shot off back to the airport  We came back on motorways which was a lot quicker and we arrived in good time for the flight back.

On arrival at Stansted we found a bus that was going to Thaxted in the next few minutes, but Les needed a fag before boarding and was so scared it would go without him he stood having his fag with one foot in the door just in case it closed and the bus went without him! (as if I would allow that to happen J)

Les arrived back at Berts 20 minutes later and knocked on Berts door to thank him, but Bert was up the workingmen’s club having a beer.

Bert’s missus didn’t know who Les was, but none the less she invited Les in and took payment for the car parking…………..